EPISODE: Enter Mark Twain

Reviewed by Lyn Robinson 

First Season, episode 5, First aired: October 10, 1959

Guest stars: Howard Duff, John Litle, Dorothy Green
Written by: Harold Shumate
Directed by: Paul Landres

SUMMARY:

A scruffy prospector walks into town with his possessions on his back and as he is asking the sheriff where to find the newspaper office, Little Joe is thrown out of the saloon and lands at his feet. To the stranger’s surprise, the youngster gets to his feet and rushes back in. Puzzled, he asks the sheriff who the kid is and has just been told he’s a Cartwright when Joe is thrown back out again, this time knocking the stranger over. Disdaining offers of help, Joe rushes back in and the stranger asks why the sheriff isn’t stopping the trouble. He gets the explanation that people in Virginia City like to handle their own business, just as Hoss frog-marches Joe out and threatens to clobber his brother if he doesn’t get up on the pinto. Very puzzled, the stranger Sam Clemens discovers the big fella is another Cartwright. He admits to being new in town (fairly obvious, as he doesn’t know the brothers) and asks who the Cartwrights are but the sheriff says he’ll find out soon enough.

Sam goes over to the Territorial Enterprise but before he gets there, he is told to hold a horse pulling a wagon with an over-dressed ‘lady’ aboard. He does so as the self-important owner bustles off. When he asks whose horse it is, he learns that the owner is Judge Jeremy Clarence Billington. The Judge returns, very pleased with the write-up saying how he has been prevailed upon to stand for re-election. As they leave he, scolds his wife for talking to strange men but she denies it she wasn’t talking to him; the man was talking to her (nice excuse but I don’t think the Judge quite accepted it).

Sam goes into the newspaper office and introduces himself the most unsuccessful prospector to have ever blistered his hand on a pick handle. As he had an offer of a job, he thought he might as well starve doing something he knew about.  (In reality, Clemens had been sporadically contributing humorous letters to the Territorial Enterprise, and in September 1862 accepted a job to be a reporter for the paper at $25 a week).

Sam is surprised that a little one-horse town 2000 miles west of the Mississippi can publish every day but gets firmly told that the Mississippi is 200 miles east of Virginia City!  He accepts the insistence that it is a city and describes the town as a noisy rough lady with a lot of pride, deciding he is going to like it there.

Hoss and Joe are out riding and find an old prospector drinking by a fire. They warn him about the fire and tell him to go around next time. He isn’t impressed at being told to put out a fire and decides the Cartwright will get their comeuppance one-day.

Sam, cleaned up and looking very smart, reports to work. He decides to write some articles on the colorful personalities and gets told the miners want humor above all; they have a hard enough time at work.

Hoss and Joe get home just before Adam but he rushes in to say that there are men camped in high valley, so the Cartwrights head up to investigate. The men try to hide their equipment as they see the Cartwrights coming. Ben demands to know why they are there. The spokesman insists they don’t want trouble, and when Adam points out that they are trespassing, says that the Cartwrights own so much land that it is hard to work out where their land ends and the rest of the world begins. Hoss, with his gun on them, offers to point it out any time. Joe asks why they were there but they say they were sightseeing in case the Cartwrights ever want to sell some land, claiming their wagon was just prospecting equipment. Ben lets them go but Adam finds some surveying equipment they hadn’t collected and Ben is sure they are interested in land, but not necessarily in buying it.

In town, the old prospector run off by Joe is bent on getting drunk but he’s broke. Sam gives him a bottle and in return gets a story about a spirit dogging the Ponderosa -- big and black, wild and large, flitting from tree to tree, carrying off cattle and picking his teeth with a wagon tongue. Sam writes it up, embellishing it even more.

At the house, Ben and Adam are studying a map determining how the survey could be for a road or railroad cutting across the Ponderosa when a frantic Hop Sing rushes in demanding action: there are people everywhere. Adam tells him to calm down but Joe comes in to support his story. All the people have come to see the wild man. Joe has a copy of the paper with the story about the Wild Man of the Washoe. Adam sees the name Josh on it and goes to town to talk to the writer.

Adam finds Sam Clemens pleased with life as the San Francisco papers have picked up his wild man story. Adam is very pleasant but warns Sam that he won’t be in town very long if he continues writing such stories. 500 people had swarmed all over the Ponderosa, ruining a field of hay and frightening a herd of cows, four of which had to be rescued from the duck pond and the rest were still being rounded them up. He wants a retraction. The printer in the back quietly picks up a heavy punch in case things get out of hand. Sam insists it was from a reliable source. Adam says that leaves him no choice: is Sam good with a gun?

Sam protests that he doesn’t have one so Adam makes a fist. “Good with your fists then?” he asks. Sam tries to talk him to death with a long story but Adam intervenes, saying, “Are you trying to make a fool out of me? I want that retraction.” Sam falls back on the old standby “Against Policy”. Adam says that he will help him change the policy and hits out once, landing Sam on his back. One look at Adam and the printer quickly drops the punch he is holding. The printer promises Adam that he’ll get his retraction. As Adam leaves, Sam grins, “I kinda like those Cartwrights.”

On the way home, Adam sees someone running around. It’s a kid who tries to run away climbing up a canyon wall but slips and falls, so Adam takes the kid home. Joe demands to know who the kid is. Adam says he found the boy roaming the hills and takes him into the wash house for Hop Sing to clean up. As they sit at dinner, Ben warns his sons to be careful; if someone is going to pull a land grab, they will have to act soon. He doesn’t want his boys riding out alone. (Pa is being his usual protective self).  But then Hops Sing comes in threatening to quit, too much foolishment. The boy is a girl, the cook announces, much to Joe’s amusement; his eldest brother unable to tell the difference. Ben tells Hop Sing to bring her in but Hop Sing can’t because he has burnt all her clothes. Joe is instantly on his feet to with an offer to help but Ben grabs his arm. Adam pushes him back and starts to go himself but then hesitates and finally grabs a blanket conveniently over a chair. (Lovely scene as Joe is so quick to try and go see a naked girl and his father and brother are equally quick to stop him. Then Adam is visibly trying to work out what to do, as flustered as we ever see him)

Joe is still teasing his brother but when the girl comes in obviously scared, they do what they can to put her at ease. She is Rosemary Lawson. Her father a school teacher; they came looking for silver and camped near the Truckee when men came into their camp and killed her father. Ben sends her with Hop Sing to get food and to use a room at the end of the bunkhouse (wonder why he didn’t use one of the many guest rooms in the house?)

Next day, a lovely shot of the four riding through the crystal waters of the lake as they ride out, only to find more strangers. This time, it’s a scientist with grappling hooks to fish for the body of the wild man in the lake. Sam has now written a story about the death of the wild man and Joe laughs, “Some retraction you got Adam!” Adam threatens to pay Josh a little visit and from the expression on his face, it wouldn’t be pleasant for Josh, alias Sam Clemens.

In town Judge Billington is electioneering, promising to guard the rights of the working man and buying drinks, with his wife helping out. She insists her husband always wins. Sam goes over to talk to her and starts talking about the frog jumping contest of Calaveras County, but she just says he must be Josh the fella who thinks up all that junk. He insists it’s fancy writing but she disagrees. She thinks there could be a big future for him in Nevada but he wants to travel and his vote isn’t for sale.

Back in the office, Sam wants to try to make the miners think and decides there has to be a reason for the Judge spending such a lot of money to get elected. He is promised by the editor that the Enterprise will print any story as long as Sam signs it.

On the ranch, the same survey party runs into the Cartwrights again. With Adam in the lead, they chase the men, who start firing. Adam wings one of them and the man falls, so the Cartwrights pick him up and take him into town. Hoss pulls the man from his horse and they drag him into his boss’ office. Inside, his boss, Lash, is in conference with Judge Billington. Ben warns Lash that there won’t be a land grab on the Ponderosa and Adam adds that the next time his men start shooting, he won’t be delivering them back alive. Then the four Cartwrights walk out.  Sam, watching outside, pronounces that railroad stocks had taken a little drop.

Ben is sure that the railroad is going to try to checkerboard a right of way across his land and grab a large area with the connivance of Judge Billington, especially after having seen the two men together. He can’t see an easy way to counteract the threat. Just then, Rosemary comes in wearing a new dress that Hop Sing had bought. She is looking very pretty, and even Adam has to admit he can’t understand how he made such a big mistake. (Ammunition for months of teasing by his little brother). She is very grateful but then Hop Sing announces someone coming on a mule.

It’s Sam Clemens. As he dismounts, Sam tells Adam that he printed the retraction. Adam decides Sam should meet the wild man and Rosemary is introduced. Very puzzled, Sam insists that she’s the prettiest wild man he ever did see. Then he turns to business; he has come to warn them that there are warrants out for them. Ben says that he will fight if the railroad try a land grab but Sam is unconvinced that this fight can be won with guns. Joe twirls his gun, saying that most people have more respect for them but Sam takes the gun and does a few twirls of his own before handing it back, commenting, “Nice balance.” Sam still insists that there are fights which can’t be won with guns or, as Adam dryly comments, “With fists!” They need to prevent the election of Judge Billington and Sam reckons the pen is mightier than the sword, and laughter a potent weapon. The three brothers think they would rather rely on their guns but Ben is willing to try both ways, with their guns ready to back Sam’s pen if needed.

The Territorial Enterprise starts a “defeat Judge Billington campaign”. For a start, Sam runs a story about Professor Personal Pronoun running for office in Virginia City. Adam reads out the article to the amusement of the others (all by a fence – Joe is sitting on it and grinning broadly), with quotes like an alarming number of sentences starting with I make the Judge a professor in the use of the personal pronoun. The article also details the opposition of the Judge to overflowing water closets and gravy on the vegetables! The Cartwrights aren’t the only people who are amused and Lash is furious; Josh is making a laughing stock of his candidate.

Lash won’t take chances and he has Sam grabbed and beaten up in an alley. But that only manages to make Sam more determined. Sam keeps watch on the Judge’s room at the hotel and sees one of Lash’s men deliver payment in gold. Mrs. Billington wants to see it and holds out her nightgown out to collect the gold but it’s too heavy and tears the material, giving Sam a perfect story. The picture of the Judges wife with her nightgown torn off by the money amuses everyone, except Lash. Lash now orders the permanent removal of the interfering reporter.

Billington is holding forth in the saloon but now he is getting barracked by the miners when he insists he believes in fair play; they want to know how much he charges. Sam is watching the fun when Lash’s men come up and tell him to leave quietly or people will be hurt. Sam starts to go but uses the distraction of doffing his hat to a lady to knock the gun down and run for it. Word has reached the ranch that Sam has been beaten up and the Cartwrights have come to town, ignoring the warrants against them, to look for Sam. Sam is chased down the street just as the Cartwrights leave the Territorial Enterprise. Under cover of their guns, the Cartwrights get Sam in to the office to write his story. Taking it in turns to shoot and reload, the Cartwrights cover each other and all get into the office. Sam has part written his story, but the comment Billington had made at the rally that you shouldn’t believe a man who didn’t even sign his own name to his writings had got to him. When Joe calls him Josh, Sam is sure that name is wrong. The four Cartwrights are more concerned about the attack but Sam is musing about his past and his dreams of being a river pilot; the leadsman on the bow calling out the depths was music to his ears. All of the Cartwrights tell him to get on and finish his story but he reminisces, remembering the sequence “Mark four, mark three, quarter less three, half quarter twain, mark twain”.

Two bad guys try to come in the back but Hoss has them, and Adam and Ben deal with those coming in the front (Obviously need some more practice in mock fights; they look far more authentic in later episodes). Sam is oblivious as he finally finds his pen name: not Josh but Mark Twain – which means river running clear two fathoms beneath the keel, real clear sailing. Adam reckons it’s better than Josh and Sam uses it on his completed story. Hoss is still puzzled what has happened to Sam Clemens but Ben reckons they have seen the last of him

Billington loses his election and Adam has to admit that the pen was mightier than the sword as they see Mark Twain off. He promises to let them know when he is coming back and will sign the letter Mark Twain.

REVIEWS:

“A nice early family episode with some good interactions between various members of the family. I always liked the tie-in with history so it is a favorite of mine.” Lyn Robinson

“I think this is one of the better early episodes. It¹s got an interesting story ­ mostly not too far fetched - and good acting.  Bonanza somehow seemed to do better early on when it was working with historical characters or events (whether or not they were particularly accurate!). I do think they got a little off track with the wild man thing, going into a surprising amount of detail about what happened to the girl when all that detail really didn¹t do anything to advance the story, especially when they kind of just let it drop instead of pursuing it further to a real conclusion. Although I really liked Howard Duff in the part, he came across as more of a “Hollywood” version of Sam Clemens to me - too much the gentleman and unlike what I think the real Sam Clemens was like. But this was the fault of the script and other factors, not the actor. I do think the Ken Howard version was probably a more accurate depiction.” Sue W.

“This is one of the few episodes from Year 1 that I like. I like all the family interaction, with Hoss hauling Joe out of the saloon, Joe kidding Adam about the girl and so on.  The story line isn't particularly "riveting" but I enjoy watching Howard Duff give us his version of Mark Twain (I admit, though, I prefer Ken Howard's Mark Twain).” Susan Grote

“I am not that keen on this ep, apart from the opening teaser and the scene at the house when Joe teases Adam about not knowing that Rosemary was a girl. Too much guest star, not enough Cartwrights, although I do like the man playing Mark Twain, Howard Duff.”  Little Joe forever Lynne C.

“I've got to agree . . . Howard Duff wins out, IMO.  ;)” Jane

“This too is one of my favorite early episodes and my favorite Mark Twain. I always like historical fiction, so any episode that ties in colorful, famous figures of the past has my attention… Just an observation on something I find kind of corny though. Why is it in these early Bonanza ep's did they portray the Cartwright's as so aggressive and unreasonable.  Now they had every right to get angry with strangers trespassing on their land but if there is any kind of threat to the Cartwright's or the Ponderosa, in that first season, you see all the men race to the scene of the problem and bully the bad guys off the premises.  I just think it's kind of goofy.  Usually all the boys have a line or two telling the bad guys for trespassers to get off their land or else and then they all ride away together.  Much more interesting in later ep's when Cartwright compassion took over rather that aggression.” Nancy

“I like both of them as Mark Twain, but the scales tip in favor of Howard Duff…I love that opening with Joe being thrown out of the saloon over and over again.   He looks so young and so adorable. That's our stubborn Joe." Ginny

“I've never seen Ken Howard's portrayal of Twain, but I did enjoy Howard Duff's performance.  I also enjoyed the tongue-in-cheek air of this episode, with Twain's humorous comments observing the Cartwrights when they threw their weight around in town. Poor Rosemary! Whatever happened to her?  Did she rent a room from the Widow Hawkins? Get a job at the mercantile?” Melissa J.

“ ‘Those men did more to that girl besides killing her father.’  That was one of those brilliant bits that goes right over the children’s   heads but says an awful lot to the adults in the audience. If the outlaws killed the father and raped the girl, it sure makes sense to permit the girl a bit of space away from the Cartwright men. Those guest rooms had no rules.” Robin